ways to make watching football slightly entertaining, or at least tolerable

  1. Have the commentators commentate from on the field.
  2. Put a guy who has never seen a football game before in charge of drawing lines and arrows and circling things on the screen, and let him do it as the game happens.
  3. Allow refs to make up their own penalties. (“Number thirty-four…I don’t like your face…sixty-two yard penalty. Um…fifth down.”)
  4. Obstacles.
  5. Electrified. Helmets.
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