Saturday night roomie visits

Me: Zzz*snort* Huh–euh–wha…? [Sits up violently] Hello?
Housemate: Heyyyyyyy. [Feeling his way along the wall]
Me: Uh… [rubs eyes] You all right, man?
Housemate: Yeah.
Me: Um, what’s up?
Housemate: I can’t find the stop sign. [Shuffles forward, slaps at wall]
Me: What.
Housemate: The stop sign? I can’t find it.
Me: Oh-kay. Are you drunk?
Housemate: Yes!
Me: [Stumbles out from under covers] Oh-kay. That explains things. [Turns on lights]
Housemate: Oh! This is the wrong room!
Me: Uhm, yeah.
Housemate: Whoops. Sorry for scaring you. [Sticks hand out]
Me: Oh, you just startled me is all. Uh… [shakes hand]
Housemate: Okay, goodnight!
Me: Maybe you should drink some water or something.
Housemate: Good idea. Bye! [Waves]

Really horrible applications

1. Adobe Acrobat
2. PeopleSoft
3. LabView, as always
4. Blackboard

Today, I feel like a(n)…

• American
• Democrat
• Far-sighted decision maker
• Concerned citizen
• Agent of change
• Responsible person
• Patriot